So, it would seem I was right about the disinformation. I got a panicked phone call that Chef was busting into the house and carrying stuff out of it. I headed over there, and there he was, still wearing Bandido attire, with his 1%er stuff proudly displayed, and accompanied by his new girlfriend who kept smirking at me. Does she think he’s going to be any more faithful to her than he was to me?
He threatened me and the guy who is house sitting, screaming that he was going to shoot the guy’s dogs, and I called the police.
The police treated Chef like a rock star, listening to how The Club were not a gang, but a club and asking him questions. There they were, happily talking away about the “brotherhood” of it. Chef is still a Patch Holder, according to him. That isn’t the text messages I’ve been getting. It was nauseating. I ended up leaving, after disputing everything he was trying to take out of the house. Supposedly, a judge was supposed to decide, but when I left, they let him in anyways.
They let him clear it out anyways. I guess that means I can go pick up the bike. It is marital property after all.
The worst part was that our daughter Rebekkah and her friend had been going over there to pick up their friend Lee who is living there now, and she got to stand in the living room, watching her father take stuff out with his new girlfriend. Her exact words were that she never, ever wanted to see him again, hear his name again, see his girlfriend’s face again, or the truck or his motorcycle. She wanted him to just disappear from our lives forever. I’m inclined to agree right now.
If he is still pretending to be a bandit, that isn’t a good thing. If he really is still one, then yet again, he’s lying.
I’m sick of the drama. He really needs to disappear from my life. There is nothing left there to love, respect, or even like anymore. I heard his nervous, fast talking, and he even had the audacity to say, “Please Birdie, let’s talk about this.” He even called me “honey”. Right in front of that girl. Master Manipulator…
I want a different nickname. He’s tainted it.
What started out a good day is definitely ending on a sour note. 😦
— Bird
Everyone Has A Story... Again 
78 responses to “Too Much Damage”
aw honey, you got it tough right now – hang in there ♥
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Thank you, Kyle. Why do you live so far away???
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but surely, its you that lives so far away …
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lol…
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Sorry to hear about that. It sounds like it was pretty awful. Hopefully things will get better soon. Karma!
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It hurt a lot, but I’m rebounding quicker than I usually do… 🙂 Maybe all those scars on my heart are making it harder for him to slice it open. The fact that he did this right in front of our kid just kills me, but she seems to have handled it well. So, on with life.
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i don’t understand how the law can just let him come in and take stuff. isn’t any of that stuff yours???? and to do it in front of kids, omg, this is just awful in my eyes. what the hell is wrong with the law???
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The law isn’t God. God will be my defender. Maybe He just wanted to show me just how low the man has sunk and to STOP expecting the best from him. When will I stop??? Well, his girlfriend enjoying it was creepy. She kept smiling and sneering at me….weird. Well, what goes around comes around. Her boyfriend has told me before she dumb and that they seem to have nothing in common. Hello. That happens when you are 30 years older than your mate. She isn’t the only dumb one in that relationship!!
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I think you are doing better this time because it is looking so irretrievably final. This time the tooth was yanked at once, instead of by increments. Seeing the insanity, wide open, is releasing you to stop caring in that direction and begin caring about your kids’ mom. Too important to waver, now. Survival mode has kicked in.
And look — how many have got your back! Hasta help.
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lol…Oh, yes. The people on this blog have been really keeping me afloat. I have friends in my really, real life, and they help a lot. However, they are all married, and it feels uncomfortable for me keep laying out my pain to them. The blog was a blessing straight from the Lord. It has helped me to really vent, organize my thoughts, and to keep kind of a history of this so I’ll never forget the lessons I’m learning. Yes, it helps lots!! And I did notice my rebound times are getting better…lol!
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Hun even if he walks away with every material possession you have it means nothing compared to the respect of your children, things are replaceable (though I would actually demand his precious bike be considered community property and its value off set against his share from the house or he be forced to sell it nd spilt the proceeds, also take an inventary of what he removed and get it to your solicitor and have him supoena the officer ;ets see how cool he thinks chef is once he has to explain in court why he went against the judges order) what can never be replaced is the respect of your children and I personally would rather die than ever shame and humilate my kids the way has, again if his club members are reading this I hope they are proud of the sort of person they think so wonderful, maybe they want to go home and look in their own kids eyes and consider wat their kids mean to them if they can justify his actions. And for you I wish i was closer because you would get a damn big hug xxxxxx
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I love you, Paula!!! I’m calmer now than when I wrote this, but ouch!!! Why rub that woman in my face? And wait until you hear what Rebekkah told both of them…I’m thinking they aren’t feeling all that victorious anymore. 🙂
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You must have a 650cc or bigger to wear a FULL PATCH right no bike would suck
Call the police Chief and put them on notice that while going through divorce no one can take unless you both sit down and write what each of you want.
You are at a motel and left the property not sure how that works if all the joint property is there
Get some free legal advice for OK area, I think you you need to write it all down who’s is what. Then let it go.
Do you own a home or rent if you own it put it on the market so when and if it sells after paying off bills you 2 owe you get your share and start a new life.
Go see a councilor and an attorney for a divorce it is clearly past reconciling oh and the man he threatened should have pressed charges you do not threaten someone with bodily harm to him or his property(dog) and just walk away.
She was smiling because she has him now and you don’t. They may last forever you never know clearly you are in pain and each time you answer his calls or run to him or confront him he takes more of who you are away. I know you love him and would forgive him if he promised you to NEVER DO IT AGAIN many of us have walked in your shoes and no one listens till we are done with the BS I wish you well on this journey of yours. Stay safe out there.
I know one thing if you are DONE then be done, change phone number and move.
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You’re right. He got a few things I left in the care of the guy staying there, but really, he has nothing left. We rented the house, and the appliances were sold so I could pay to stay in the hotel. There is his truck, his harley,and my car. The bike I want sold and split between us, he can have his truck and I want my car. But, as far as legal concerns, there is nothing to fight over. And I am done. You are right…I have to stop responding to his baiting because it only shows he still has some power over me. I’m finished with that. I’m getting a new phone in a couple of days, and if I can’t block his number, I’m going to have it changed completely. I want to break away from him completely before I get bitter. I don’t really think I am going to ever feel the same way about him again, and that helps. Seeing him rub my face in all that he has done, then charm the cops with his gangland stories, deal with his girlfriend enjoying the drama (which shows the depth of her character)…it’s just too much. Too much damage. I am DONE!
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I am not saying it will all be easy I tried over and over to get away and when I finally did it took me getting a restraining order and BEING DONE no going back for more BS over and over I was only with him 13 years and he was never what he had become in the beginning but we all change through ups and downs and struggles with life. I went to an attorney and it took one year to go through and get final decree but it has been 15 years since police took him away from here at times I lost tough with the fact life would ever be right and I can promise you if you fight for what you need and pray to God to help you heal your heart and move on eventually you will and only then will your soar again.
Enjoy your weekend and know you are blessed to start new so many never get the chance
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I know you are very right. I’m not blind to just how fortunate I am right now.Most people don’t have the network of encouragement and prayer that I have. I found out he called the cops on his own daughter last night because she wouldn’t stop pointing out the truth to him. He tried to blame me for the whole marriage collapsing, and she pointed out each and every thing he had done…she was here. She’d witnessed it. He threatened violence to his own kid. What a winner. She embarrassed him in front of his girlfriend, who used to be one of her friends, and when Bekkie speaks, she can cut to the quick. His excuses just wouldn’t work on her and she refused to leave while he was gathering his stuff. He tried and tried, but the girl just unleashed on him and Tion. I know God will heal both of our hearts, but I also know it takes a while. We’ll be fine, and she woke me up at 4am this morning to talk about it. She is okay, and while she feels a little like she let God down by not being silent, she felt good to be able to look him and the girl in the face and point out the truth to them when they absolutely do anything they can to not face it themselves. It was a bad night, but today is a new day, and I will have a new phone number and protective order soon and this drama can be over with. I’m really, really ready to move on.
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I will say a prayer that you and your family are safe.
Best of luck with it all
I always said I was so rich when I was flat broke because I finally had peace of mind I pray you too find that in the end
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Hello,
Please let yourdaughter know that there is a time to be silent and a time to speak. And I think yesterday was the time to speak out. It would have haunted her for the rest of her life if she stood by and said nothing. I think she did the right thing. She is very brave and insightful to see past her fathers lies. It took me up until my mid 40’s to fianlly see what my mother and sister had always been saying about my father, that I just did not want to see. Good for her. She was brave and she did the right thing.
God bless all of you.
Ivonne
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Bird, hang in there. Chef is obviously a very sick and disturbed man who will one day wake up and find himself alone. You on the other hand are headed in the right direction – away from him. Otherwise he will pull toy under withhim. Somewhere along the way he stopped being the manthat you love. So set him free and let The Lord be your husband and love and adore you in a way that only God can do. Draw close to him, pray for Chef but leave him at the feet of Jesus, pray for your children, pray for God’s Will for you And rest in Him while He rebuilds you a life that only He can give.
Praying for you and your children.
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You’re right. Satan attacked me well today, but I have to remember I’m not needing to depend on the law enforcement officers. I need to depend on the Lord. I’ve got my feet back underneath me. I’ve made plans for my weekend, have plans with some friends next weekend…I’m going to be okay. And I sure don’t want to be Chef right now. The more he hurts me, the less God is going to like it. I just got off a phone call that made me so very happy. She was a friend I had known a while back, and we always had hit it off. She reached out to me, listened to me, I listened to what she is going through, and I just knew God had thrown this net over me for protection. So, you are very right. Thank you, faithful!!
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I am so sorry that you had such a bad day. I also can not believe the police officers just let him into the house. And I agree with everything Paula Acton wrote, just wait until the Judge gets a hold of this and the most important things is the kids and what all of this is going to mean to them. You can replace things but you can not replace the love or respect of your kids.
Hang in there in Bird.
🙂
Ivonne
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Thank you, Ivonne. It was a total accident that Rebekkah was there. I even tried to get ahold of her and stop her going there, but it was too late. Maybe God wanted Chef to deal with her, because Rebekkah let him and the girlfriend just have it. She told them what they could do with their excuses and apologies….yikes. We decided not to talk about it tonight so she could go and enjoy an evening with her friends and not think about it. But the little I heard was harsh. Chef has none of us anymore. How sad when he finally realizes he threw his whole family away!!!
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The guy I was with pretty much abandoned his baby daughter to be with the new girlfriend, now the current wife and they have 2 littles now. Don’t know what’s going to happen when she finds out that he cheated on her multiple times. I am so glad I am out of that mess. The first wife, that I am now friends with says I am her karma for the second wife because he cheated on the first with the second..so glad I am not going to be number three. God does look out for us even when we go astray sometimes……
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Yes, He does. I feel like I’ve paid in full every crappy thing I ever did when I was young and I’ve really learned a lot of very, very valuable lessons. God only disciplines the children that He loves, and I embrace His discipline, knowing He is trying to teach His kid how to be more like Him. I’m sorry about you being abandoned too. It must have been so much harder especially with small children. At least mine were adults, and none of them are afraid to say what they mean, and mean what they say. 🙂 I’m kind of proud of them.
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No, I am ashamed to say I am not the wife–never have been with this guy. I am just the one he has played around with, when I was 18 and now. His first wife has a teenage daughter, who recently stood up to her father just like your daughter did and called him out on all of his crap. He is still married to second wife with the two kids. He started an affair with me (now ended) in Feburary and told me he was divorcing his wife, which I later found out was a lie. I was just dumb enough to fall for this guy two times in my life. But he was the first guy I was ever with so he has always been in my heart all of my life.
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Well, obviously, mistakes were made, but anything can be forgiven. It is obvious you are remorseful, and you’re paying for your mistake in a different way. I am sorry for your pain, and I can totally understanding loving your “first”. I hope you come out of the pain quickly…I wouldn’t wish this kind of hurt on anyone. Love you, Ivonne.
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I am so sorry. This has to be so hard. I cannot imagine . . . How on earth does one go about making the police mind the law?! It sounds like such a dangerous situation!
I do agree you need a different nickname. And I am praying for you and yours.
Much love.
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Thank you, Katharine. I’m thinking of just using my name — Catherine. Lol…Easy for you to remember, huh?
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I love it! Catherine is such an elegant Greek name and means “purity” which you may disclaim, if you like, but it always gave me such a good goal, when I was little.
Anyway, i was thinking about how elegantly you have presented yourself, here and how it would fit you to have a more grown-up name . . .
. . . one I can remember. Yeah. I like it.
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I always liked that it meant purity. I think I’ll just use my own name from now on. Unless the contest produces something really, really awesome! LOL!!
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Bird,
How ’bout “Cat”? Brandy and I are still praying for the whole mess.
“So stay strong in the Lord and the Power of His Might,
put on all His armor and fight the good fight.
when we all know our weakness, He becomes so strong.
He gives us the power and the strength to carry on”
– Petra’s song ‘More Power to Ya’
🙂
-mike
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Thank you for your prayers. This seems like a particularly long Valley of the Shadow of Death!!! But there has to be an end in sight sometime soon, right? 🙂
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Therefore, my dear brothers, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain.
1 Corinthians 15:58
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And Cat works fine for me…kind of ironic,huh? You know, Cat and Bird….lol
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A BUNCH IRONIC! Hilarious, too. Love it. 😀
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🙂 🙂
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new contest….
what will be Bird’s new nickname? any long time followers have suggestions?
-mike
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I’ll probably lose the contest, but I am very partial to “Cathie”. Signed, Kathy 😉
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🙂
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Yay!!! I love this contest!!!
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Hi Bird,
It’s been a long while since my last visit. I feel off the edge of the earth for a while. Not sure how long my moment of clarity/sanity is going to last, so I thought I’d stop by and say “hi” while it lasts. I am sorry to read all the crap that’s happened in your life since last time. I really am. It sucks majorly and I wish you could have had your happy ending. But it ain’t over until the fat lady sings. However, judging by how we’re both shrinking in our bodily presence, and given that neither of us were given the gift of singing voices, I doubt any of us will be that fat lady.
Hugs, Sara.
You will always have a very special place in my tiny heart.
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It is so wonderful to hear from you!! I fell off the earth for awhile here in Blogland myself, and I know how we sometimes need to do that. As for the fat lady, she has sung her last note on this mess. I do not want him back. He’s become cruel, and I can’t relate to that at all. So, the sooner I can get this divorce, the happier I’ll be!
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In my experience people become the most cruel when they hate themselves the most. No, it doesn’t excuse his behavior at all, but I suspect he doesn’t like himself much these days. It’s a vicious circle. The meaner he gets, the more he hates himself, and so he has to lash out even more. Enough with the psychoanalyzing, because the truth is I couldn’t give a hoot about him and his feelings. I care about you.
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Awww. I love you, too! Well, he’s pretty angry today, but he’s directing it at my son. Chef called the police on Rebekkah last night, Caitlyn is back in Japan living her life, I’m not dealing with him anymore, so the only person left to bully was DJ. I told Bek to tell Dj not to take any more calls. If Tion wants to be his “better half” than she is going to have to get used to these tirades he has when he doesn’t get his way or something is bothering him. Stop bullying this family. lol…He actually bullied Tion into giving him her phone to call the police on his own kid last night because he didn’t want the Bandidos to know he actually called the cops, which would make him a snitch. LOL!! Bekkie says Tion didn’t want him to use her phone, and resisted, but he bullied her into giving her phone over and he called the cops. I don’t like this guy at all, but I’m starting to really understand why he picked this girl. She is easy to manipulate and bully, and even when he was going off all around her, she seemed unable to have an emotion. It was creepy. She might be on the “stuff” too, though I don’t really know. She told Rebekkah she no longer attends church. Chef is just leaving a trail of destruction in every life he touches.
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It should be “fell” not “feel”…
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men suck.
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lol…that one does!
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Men can be such fools… He doesn’t realize that affairs usually end, but the memories of sons and daughters rarely gets erased.
A long time ago, my father did something similar to what your husband is doing. He’s tried to visit me every year for the past 14 years, but I’m just not interested. I don’t want people who are capable of behaving that way in my life.
BTW, the first affair lasted less then a year and I’ve lost count of how many there have been since then.
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I’m sorry your dad did that to you. I would just die if my children lost respect for me for just up and walking away from them. I don’t how anyone could do that to children they’ve raised. He called the police on his own daughter last night, called her names, and got in her face. Trust me. She unleashed a fury on him and Tion that rivals anything I’ve ever said. And Rebekkah has this ability to cut through the crap and call it the way it is. He got so mad at her for just cutting through his excuses and calling him a liar and a thief, he called the cops. My poor daughter. I feel like I’ve been such a selfish bundle of blubbery mess that I should have been protecting her more. But, I’ve apologized to her and Monday she and I both are getting protective orders, so at least she won’t have to deal with this vile crap from him anymore. And I don’t care if he and Tion live the rest of their lives together…I don’t want him back. She can be the one always wondering when he is going to cheat on her. I want something better.
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There is no use asking ‘why’ the police let him have entry and remove things (likely to sell for money) …it’s done. For him to see his daughter standing there watching and to not be affected at all or remorseful at all shows how far he’s gone..It must be hard for you to realize you spent so many years with who is now a total stranger (and jerk to be be blunt) Maybe now he will leave you alone and the harassment will end…”Please God”!!! ..Thinking of you …Diane
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Thank you, Diane. I’m getting protective orders for both myself and Rebekkah. He called the police on her because she wouldn’t shut up…literally. He kept getting in her face saying vile things to her, and she wouldn’t back down. Brave kid, but it makes me nervous that this went on. The cops made her leave, and she told them exactly what she thought of them too…lol. My kids have some courage, I’ll give them that. Today, we’ve agreed that we aren’t going to mention his name ever again until my divorce is finished, and he can go sell the tiny bit he can for the couple of hundred dollars it was worth, start his life with his new girl, and deal with his consequences. We don’t need to live through his consequences with him. We are moving on. My prayer today is that I don’t have to deal with him today at all. He has never paid his taxes in all the years I’ve known him (I have), and the first thing the lawyer told me to bring in was my tax returns. His life is about to get really real. So, no need for me to flip out about the tiny amount of junk he got out of a house I didn’t even want. I’m okay today. Have plans for the weekend and for next weekend, and I know for a fact, things can only get better!!! 🙂
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Make sure you sign the innocent spouse form or something like that with IRS 🙂 you are married still 😦 ask lawyer about it and Protactive orders are a start and you and him will sit before a judge soon and make it permanant if just cause is given but remember it works both ways a lot of woman end up in jail for breaking them out thins way 😦
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I paid my taxes as single since I couldn’t get him to file. I overpaid all these years. Do you think that helps me?
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I am not sure of your states laws but I know there is legal steps when it comes to Federal I hope you can get a caring attorney to work it all out for you divorce is hard but the alternative is worse at the moment 😦
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That’s just sick, Cathie. As always, I admire your clarity here. You are spot on about the idea of giving him too much power. Funny, grief is like the wind, it comes as it pleases. I’m sure you’ll be like me and have more weak spots, but you do have the Lord and ooodles of friends like me praying for you. You know what else you have? That rock solid conviction that if this man interferes with the spiritual growth or emotional stability or physical safety of your children any more, it isn’t going to be pretty. Done.
Much love,
Victoria
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Thanks, Victoria. Yeah. Once Rebekkah had her meltdown the other day, everything in my head shifted. But the girl is one tough cookie, and now Chef knows that he can blow smoke up some people’s butts, but not hers. She was relentless with both Chef and Tion about adultery, infidelity, lies, stealing, curses, selfishness, and she told Tion about him chasing me with an axe. Tion just seems not very bright to me…easily swayed and Bekkie could tell that a tiny bit of what she was saying was bothering her. But, Chef is having a really hard time dealing with his own guilt and blame in all of this, and Bekkie isn’t like me. She isn’t willing to shoulder any of the blame just so he’ll feel better. I am learning a lot from my daughter. It is okay to own up to your parts of things going wrong. I am definitely not innocent in every thing I did and especially said, but I am doing him no favors by letting him blame me for ruining a marriage. I didn’t bring meth into our home. I didn’t bring porn into our home. I didn’t cheat on him, not come home for days, take my last few paychecks and desert a family so I could party with my new girlfriend and my friends. I have to stop trying to ease his pain by allowing him to shove some of that stuff on me. Rebekkah is actually teaching me that by the way she responds to him. She cuts through his excuses and always comes back to the heart of the matter…He is selfish and believed that because he was in this motorcycle club, his happiness outranked what was right for everyone else in his life, including his new girlfriend. She told Bekkie yesterday that she no longer goes to church. Who knows, and who cares. But if she really was one of God’s children, the he’s done her a disservice as well. No one’s life he has touched in the last year is better because of it…only worse. And that was Rebekkah’s wisdom that made him call the cops on her. I’m really, really blessed that God gave me such a wise daughter.
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” Does she think he’s going to be any more faithful to her than he was to me?”
You make a fair point there, Bird. The likelihood if Chef hurting her as he did you as collosal. She has no reason to smirk.
Your daughter sounds so strong to have told her father all of those things.
Keep your chin up, you’ll come out of this all the better and stronger for it.
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He already wasn’t being faithful to her. He was sending me love texts every other day and there is another girl that he’s been seen around town with…also Rebekkah’s age…that he had been fooling around with when he worked at Panera. He’s about himself right now, and as long as Tion keeps feeding his ego, she’ll be okay. But if she ever crosses him, he’ll dump her like a sack of trash, just like me. He doesn’t want to see himself clearly right now, so any one who tells him the truth is 86ed from his life. Very cowardly, if you ask me. But that is how it is. He’s a master talker, but some of us know the truth and all the words in the world won’t cover the really cruel,selfish things he’s done. I believe God makes us all see ourselves clearly eventually, and I try to keep that in mind when I’m trying to control my reactions. I would like to not cringe when I look at myself in the mirror.
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Catherine
I just despise hearing how your family has been affected by one of the people that is suppose to love cherish and protect them, a father. As I sit and think about this there are things that make it seem better that it could have been…..Your children are at an age where they cannot be persuaded about who is right or wrong in the situations that arise when this happens when children are young it is more harmful for their development into adulthood. I hope you can get closure regarding this
life altering situation. Things are just things, self worth and devotion to
your precious children cannot be taken away. I wish I had a home in the mountains for you to go to for a brief period of reprieve from the vortex of chaos in OK. Love and prayers for you & yours.
BTW…..I personally have never known you as “Bird”!! So any name change will be good with me ❤
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Let’s just stick with Catherine. It is my name, and now that he is calling his new girlfriend his new birdie, I really want to yack. lol…I would ever want a boyfriend to recycle a nickname that belonged to his wife he left me for. …Of course, I wouldn’t have done any of this anyways, but I am amazed that this sort of thing doesn’t irritate her as much as it does me. Do you ever watch “The New Adventures of Old Christine”?….Lol. I feel like Old Bird. 🙂
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Remember the Phoenix, is a bird who died in the fire and rose out of the ashes rebirthed and made new. Maybe we should call you Pheonix?
🙂
Ivonne
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Much love and prayers, today, too. Hubs and I are praying for your safety!!!!!
I so totally pray that you and Bek don’t land in jail.
It is so important to realize he has threatened to use a gun.
Think.
He has threatened to use a gun.
He has threatened to use a gun.
I am so glad about the restraining order, which protects even HIM from his own drugged stupidity, but just remember . . .
Do not be afraid, because God is with you.
But do think.
Think.
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I will. I’m staying completely away from him, and so is Bekkie. And I know I should take the gun thing more seriously, but I just can’t. He isn’t a brave guy.
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Which is why he said “dogs”, instead of what he maybe was too, umm, timid to say? Hmm?
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Yep. One thing I’ve always known in my marriage is that he is a fantastic talker. However, whenever the real hard things in life came around, I’m the one who handled them. All of this stuff hurt me because I loved him so much, and yes, when he started the weirdo hitting stuff and threatening stuff, I was afraid. But, I really, truly believe in my heart of hearts that he is too big a coward to actually go through with his threats. When Bekkie wouldn’t shut up or back down, he called the police. When he chased me with the axe, and I produced the tazer, he was very much afraid of me, and ran away quickly. So, I really think he is trying to intimidate me, but I’m thinking he isn’t dangerous to me for real. I’m being careful…but it is hard to take a coward seriously. It really is.
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But the desperation of needing a hit, or the bravado from meth influence, etiher one, couldn’t it make a different person out of him? . . . plus, as the fears pile up, who’s to say which of his fears will take over the rest?
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I promised to lift you (and Yours) in my thoughts each morning. I’ve kept my word. Keep being true to yourself…the compass is already inside you. So impressed with your display of courage – Rock on Sister! Dan
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Thanks, Dan! I appreciate the prayers!!
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I’ve been reading the unfolding drama of your life and I am praying for you. Our society today is so messed up. People call good -bad and bad–good–I think that one of your soon to be ex biggest problems is probably drugs. He has become a slave to them. It is almost like a demonic possession that turns a person into someone that they never dreamed they’d become. The person you loved and married is still in there somewhere and that is probably what you are reacting to at times but you cannot enable him in this destructive lifestyle. The only thing that will make a difference is for him to get off the drugs.
As I commented last time, I am so glad you took that first step to return to church. I suspect you may have had some negative experiences in a church before. We all have. Churches are flawed because people are flawed. What you need to do is find some truly loving, mature Christians to pray for you and encourage you. And you will find them–they are there:) Remember the church is your other “family.” We are all one in Christ and we are his body. And we will be there for one another. I can tell it just from reading the comments on your blog. You have many people praying for you and you can be assured that God’s plans for you are good:)
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Well, Rebekkah’s best friend, who she’s been praying for the Lord to save for nine years, became a Christian today!!! She was there for all of Chef’s drama when he called the police on our daughter, and smack in the middle of it, she turned to Bekkie and said she was ready! So, you know what? God is turning even this evil into something beautiful!! I liked church last week. Going back again tomorrow!
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Zowie! That is wonderful about Rebekkah’s friend! What a wonderful thing! God is good all the time!
🙂
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Yes HE IS!!!!
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Sweet Catherine, your pain is our pain too. You’re strong, and getting stronger. When you have doubt, when you think you can’t take anymore, when you think you aren’t strong enough, remember we are all here for you.
You’re a great Mom and a good person. Better days are ahead of you.
ps. I love Cat! Sweet irony. But I’m biased.
Sam
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lol. Thanks, Sam. It is ironic, isn’t it?! And thank you for the sweet words. I know this has got to pass. I’m just impatient for one day where I don’t have to deal with all of this. I want one day to come that all of this is just a past memory. I know. It’ll come, but I hate mornings like this!!
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Hang in there. And don’t let him call you Birdie anymore.
Hug your kids and change the locks and remove him from your life.
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Done. Done, Done, and working on it. LOL!!!
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Hugs. You’re a good soul. Take care of you and know that i am thinking of you.
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Thank you, Melissa! You’re a good soul, too!
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